'Must be nice with all that therapist money': Woman tries to guilt therapist sister-in-law into paying for her kid's school fees, therapist SIL refuses and sets healthy boundaries

Author image for Briana Viser
Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Oct 8, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

Unless someone is born into extreme wealth, money is always a point of contention for most people on earth. It can make people desperate and bring out their ugly side. Bitterness is easily sprung from seeing someone with money with you don't have any. No one ever wants to feel like that, but it's also not someone else's responsibility to save a person who lacks basic funds for themselves. 

In the story below, the narrator is a 40-year-old therapist with children. At a family function, she was expressing relief at getting all of the kid's school fees done and paid for. Her nosy sister-in-law comes in with ultimate guilt tripping, trying to tell her she should pay also for the SIL's kid's school fees since a therapist should be empathetic and giving to others, as well as having the funds to do so. Obviously, this is a ridiculous thing to put on someone else, and the narrator actually did a great job at establishing her boundaries. Read the full story below. 

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  • 01

    AITAH for refusing to pay my SIL’s kids’ school fees while paying mine?

    Therapist in a session
    via ilonakozhevnikova / Canva

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    I'm 40, I work as a therapist, and today was one of the most exhausting family get-togethers I've had in a while. We were at my
    via u/ChuckleCrumbs
  • 03
    in-laws this Sunday, and the topic of back to school came up. I mentioned I had just finished
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  • 04
    paying my two kids' fees and how relieved I was to have that sorted before the week starts.
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  • 05
    Out of nowhere, my SIL(35) jumps in and made a statement that "Must be nice. With all that
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  • 06
    therapist money you should help family instead of just bragging.
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  • 07
    At first I laughed at it because I thought she was teasing. But she kept going, saying that I should pay for one of her three kids'
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  • 08
    school fees too since I can afford it and since my whole job is about helping people. She actually turned to me this time
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  • 09
    Therapist room
    via SeventyFour / Canva

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 10
    she asked: What good is all your empathy if you can't even help your own nieces and nephews?
    via u/ChuckleCrumbs
  • 11
    That one was hard. I told her straight that my responsibility is to my own kids, not hers. I reminded her that my work is a
    via u/ChuckleCrumbs
  • 12
    profession and not free emotional or financial labor on demand. She didn't take it well. She started
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  • 13
    yelling that I was cold and selfish, and immediately stood up and left us all.
    via u/ChuckleCrumbs
  • 14
    Therapist
    via Markus Winkler from Pexels / Canva

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 15
    Now my husband is upset because he thinks I could've softened my response given the kind of work I do. But the truth is,
    via u/ChuckleCrumbs
  • 16
    in therapy we're taught very clear boundaries. You don't take on what isn't yours to carry. That's
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  • 17
    exactly how I try to live my life too. If I start paying her kids' fees this time, where does it stop? Next term, Clothes? Medical bills? It just will never end.
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  • 18
    Part of me feels guilty because yes, I do make more than her and I know she's struggling. But I can't ignore how entitled and
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  • 19
    manipulative that whole exchange felt. Using my profession against me like that as
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  • 20
    if being a therapist means I have to bankroll her kids, really crossed a line. So, AITAH?
    via u/ChuckleCrumbs
  • 21
    Apprehensive-Gur... • 10h ago NTA But your husband and SIL are. The entitlement is ridiculous.
    via u/Apprehensive-Gur-551
  • 22
    neuroctopus • 10h ago NTA. I'm a therapist, but I'm ruined for polite company because I treat combat Vets.
    via u/neuroctopus
  • 23
    I would probably have bluntly said no, and how dare you ask?!
    via u/neuroctopus

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therapist family drama drama family feud relationships sister in law lol love family reddit thread Reddit funny money dating
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